HACKS AND THE PLETHORA of campy fags that supply live feed of Hollywood gossip, supposed fashion comment, hair style reviews, star trivia and other nonsense ad nauseum to daytime TV have "come out" in unified apology for falsely reporting yesterday that Russell Crowe had been killed.
Early reports propagated via the lavender network favoured by closet pillow biters such as Kochie and fellow Botox afficionado Richard Wilkins claimed that Crowe had fallen off the back of a mountain in Austria. After initial conjecture that perhaps the fact was that Crowe had fallen off the back of an Austrian mountaineer, an infinitely more plausible story, it was ascertained that the breaking news was indeed no more than breaking wind on the part of the vegemite-drilling news fraternity.
Delving deeper into the anals (sic) of Hollywood news over the past week, it was revealed that an off the cuff comment by a Hollywood socialite relating an anecdote about Kyle Sandilands as the "dead c*nt" that, whilst attempting to gain employment in the US during which he spent thousands grovelling to the party set on Sunset Boulevard, fell to the floor at a toga party after snorting a mountain of coke, allegedly supplied by an unnamed Austrian. The identity of the mystery coke dealer has so far not been revealed, however he is reputed to have left the party saying "I'll be back".
The story had been taken out of context, and before long the rumour mill had done the rest, Russell Crowe spent today Twittering retorts to the erroneous reports, Kyle Sandilands sought refuge as per usual at Ken's.
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Topic: Hollywood Rumour Mill Apologizes - Rusty Is Alive and Well (Read 208 times)