As much as I embrace the forthright nature of your approach SG, I'd probably attempt to get the other side to concede first by use of aggressive diplomacy. Then, if they were unswayed in their stance, I'd unleash the armed forces and engage in a little policy realignment in the offending nation.
In the case of Iraq though, what needs to be done next? Ought we pull up stumps now and leave them to their own devices or should we attempt to get them into a more stable position before leaving? And what would that more stable position look like?
I think that there is little, if any, prospect that Iraq will ever be free of sectarian violence. It has been around since the schism in the Islamic faith, and quite possibly well before in the form of tribal violence, and I don't believe that it will end. The most likely result is that Iraq will end up a Shia theocracy alongside Iran and the world will be left with one large, and more radical than we'd like, Islamic bloc controlling one third of the worlds' oil reserve.
Or will the Jews nuke them before that happens?
What should have been done is:
OK Syria, you're handing over weaponry to Iraqi insurgents.
We'll keep running democracy education programs in Iraq, in the mean time here's a few hundred Abrams tanks to deal with.
Right, now you leaders of Syria are dangling from a rope who is it that's supplying arms to the terrorists?
Iran?
OK, whilst we run democracy workshops in Iraq and Syria here's a few hundred Abrams to deal with.
Repeat ad nauseum until the leaders get the message that we won't be fucked with and that if they want to preserve their lives, let alone their positions of power, they damn well better get on board with the international peace process otherwise our might will prevail.
Ultimately if we can educate people for long enough that democracy is the way to go then democracy will take root and grow. We just have to stop as many of the "bad guys" supplying guns to the local strong men as possible so the people have a chance.
Same problem with Vietnam - we didn't stop the inflow of weaponry from the Chinese.
Same throughout history, the political will to do what has to be done is so often lacking for fear of upsetting some dictator or another whilst at the same time the politicians are happy to order young men (predominantly) to continue to lose their lives in pursuit of global democracy which is being held up by that self same dictator.
SG