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Author Topic: I would have posted in here earlier but to be honest some of you people scare me  (Read 4122 times)

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Bookworm.

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Re: I would have posted in here earlier but to be honest some of you people scare me
« Reply #15 on: December 17, 2007, 04:07:03 PM »
Welcome!!! Do you like squirrels? Or religion? If you do this joke is perfect for you! Enjoy!

There were four country churches in a small Texas town: The Presbyterian Church, the Baptist Church, the Methodist Church and the Catholic Church. Each church was overrun with pesky squirrels.

One day, the Presbyterian Church called a meeting to decide what to do about the squirrels. After much prayer and consideration they determined that the squirrels were predestined to be there and they shouldn't interfere with God's divine will.

In the Baptist Church the squirrels had taken up habitation in the baptistery. The deacons met and decided to put a cover on the baptistery and drown the squirrels in it. The squirrels escaped somehow and there were twice as many there the next week.

The Methodist Church got together and decided that they were not in a position to harm any of God's creation. So, they humanely trapped the Squirrels and set them free a few miles outside of town. Three days later, the squirrels were back.

But -- The Catholic Church came up with the best and most effective solution. They baptized the squirrels and registered them as members of the church. Now they only see them on Christmas and Easter.
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Thaluikhain

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Re: I would have posted in here earlier but to be honest some of you people scare me
« Reply #16 on: December 17, 2007, 06:24:34 PM »
Didn't you post that one elsewhere in the forum?
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Phenolphthalein

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Re: I would have posted in here earlier but to be honest some of you people scare me
« Reply #17 on: December 17, 2007, 06:37:19 PM »
Quote from: Random junky action movie character on December 17, 2007, 06:24:34 PM
Didn't you post that one elsewhere in the forum?

She's starting to run out of excruciatingly bad jokes.
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Bookworm.

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Re: I would have posted in here earlier but to be honest some of you people scare me
« Reply #18 on: December 17, 2007, 07:20:18 PM »
Quote from: Random junky action movie character on December 17, 2007, 06:24:34 PM
Didn't you post that one elsewhere in the forum?

Oh no? Did I really??? I just really liked that one and forgot that I had posted it before...

Quote from: Santa's Little Bludger on December 17, 2007, 06:37:19 PM
She's starting to run out of excruciatingly bad jokes.

NEVER!!! The internet is endless, my friend!!
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Phenolphthalein

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Re: I would have posted in here earlier but to be honest some of you people scare me
« Reply #19 on: December 17, 2007, 07:25:19 PM »
Quote from: bookworm on December 17, 2007, 07:20:18 PM
NEVER!!! The internet is endless, my friend!!

The internet may be endless, but your skills are very limited.

P.S. I'm not your friend.
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Bookworm.

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Re: I would have posted in here earlier but to be honest some of you people scare me
« Reply #20 on: December 17, 2007, 07:37:29 PM »
Quote from: Santa's Little Bludger on December 17, 2007, 07:25:19 PM
The internet may be endless, but your skills are very limited.

You know nothing about my skills. Finding jokes is a hobby.

Quote from: Santa's Little Bludger on December 17, 2007, 07:25:19 PM
P.S. I'm not your friend.

That bit was sarcastic. Duh! (I was actually afraid to write that in case you got horribly offended. It could have been worse)
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Phenolphthalein

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Re: I would have posted in here earlier but to be honest some of you people scare me
« Reply #21 on: December 17, 2007, 07:45:56 PM »
Quote from: bookworm on December 17, 2007, 07:37:29 PM
That bit was sarcastic. Duh!

Yes.

No shit.
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Bookworm.

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Re: I would have posted in here earlier but to be honest some of you people scare me
« Reply #22 on: December 17, 2007, 07:50:13 PM »
Quote from: Santa's Little Bludger on December 17, 2007, 07:45:56 PM
Yes.

No shit.

See? Sarcasm. I find it quite useful  :-D
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Keridwen

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Re: I would have posted in here earlier but to be honest some of you people scare me
« Reply #23 on: December 20, 2007, 12:42:46 PM »
Quote from: rudolph on December 17, 2007, 03:49:08 PM
What's a subtle nuance?  Are they like bricks?  My daddy says some of the kids in here are as subtle as bricks, whatever that means.  And if people from the internets are throwing them at me, how do I know when I need to duck?


Hi!!1!LolzOmG.

lol whenever you hear *whoosh* just run for cover lol it will mean you'll definitley miss something lol
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Pertinax

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Re: I would have posted in here earlier but to be honest some of you people scare me
« Reply #24 on: December 20, 2007, 01:24:22 PM »
You see, this is where banning people for being abusive runs counter to the need to rid this place of fuckwits.

I'm happy to point out bookworm's inadequacies at this point in my usual elloquent, derisive fashion but I don't know how much more of a fool I could make of it than its already made of itself.

Why isn't it OK just to tell these people to fuck off?
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...for love is preserved by the link of obligation which, owing to the baseness of men, is broken at every opportunity for their advantage; but fear preserves you by a dread of punishment which never fails

Mez

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Re: I would have posted in here earlier but to be honest some of you people scar
« Reply #25 on: December 20, 2007, 01:33:53 PM »
Well for a start, Perti, you get banned, and we would all DIE OF BOREDOM were it not for your excruciatingly hilarious bad-boy persona.

Plus, everyone was a newbie once, even you.  My own baptism of fire still sits like a little hard rock somewhere in my squishy gizzards.
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Pertinax

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Re: I would have posted in here earlier but to be honest some of you people scar
« Reply #26 on: December 20, 2007, 02:10:06 PM »
Quote from: Mezzaclaws on December 20, 2007, 01:33:53 PM
Well for a start, Perti, you get banned, and we would all DIE OF BOREDOM were it not for your excruciatingly hilarious bad-boy persona.

Plus, everyone was a newbie once, even you.  My own baptism of fire still sits like a little hard rock somewhere in my squishy gizzards.

We all got flamed on arrival. It was a Chaser tradition and we all endured it. Those that couldn't left and so this forum self selected for feisty people with thick skin and a healthy sense of humour. Now we are surrounded by fragile try hards. Its tragic.

You're right about the bad boy thing, I'm not bad, I'm just misunderstood.
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...for love is preserved by the link of obligation which, owing to the baseness of men, is broken at every opportunity for their advantage; but fear preserves you by a dread of punishment which never fails

grooviechickie

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Re: I would have posted in here earlier but to be honest some of you people scar
« Reply #27 on: December 20, 2007, 02:33:17 PM »
Quote from: Pertinax on December 20, 2007, 02:10:06 PM
You're right about the bad boy thing, I'm not bad, I'm just misunderstood.

Awwwwwww my liddle schnookiewookumses!

FUCK. I'm writing in the newbie welcome thread... which I swore I wouldn't do for a long time. I don't want to get banninated again. It was cold and scary out there in the real world. *shudder*
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"I love you, and because I love you, I would sooner have you hate me for telling you the truth than adore me for telling you lies." Pietro Aretino

Pinball Neil

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Re: I would have posted in here earlier but to be honest some of you people scare me
« Reply #28 on: December 20, 2007, 02:37:42 PM »
Ooh you're going out on a limb saying fuck in here too.  :-P
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grooviechickie

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Re: I would have posted in here earlier but to be honest some of you people scar
« Reply #29 on: December 20, 2007, 02:42:42 PM »
I CAN'T HANDLE THE STRESS!

*runs away, screaming, pulling out clumps of hair*
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"I love you, and because I love you, I would sooner have you hate me for telling you the truth than adore me for telling you lies." Pietro Aretino
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